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Musicals, slavery, and heterosexuality... Tim 
Posted by: Tim at 11:00 PM EST on 6/30/2002
File Under: Movies & TV

So I was at work today and almost snagged a copy of Moulin Rouge. (Working at library = easy access to free DVDs.) But before checking it out, I decided to ask around to find out if it was actually any good, or if it would just waste two hours of my time. I asked one of the girls I was working with, Megan, if it was good, and she proceeded to nod quite enthusiastically, but then quickly added "But I don't know if you'd like it, being a heterosexual male..." This did not bode well. So I turn to my supervisor, Mike, and say "Mike, from a guy's perspective, is this movie any good?" and I hear this in return: "Oh, I refuse to watch it." Ummm... okay, why? "Because it's a musical." Yeah. Well, much to the behest of the girls around me, I opted for the Roots DVD set instead. I received flak for this. Why? I don't know.

I was almost convinced to get Moulin Rouge anyway, especially since I figured if I felt my masculinity shrivel up and die, I could always turn the movie off and go download some porn or something to feel like a man again. One of the girls (Karyn) suggested I just turn off the sound and masturbate to Nicole Kidman. I don't think that'll be an option.

Anyhow, I'll leave this decision up to any hetero male secure in his sexuality that may be reading this. Is watching Moulin Rouge worth the risk of diminished masculinity? (And that's not exactly something I can afford to risk...) Could I possibly (OH MY GOD!?) ENJOY it? Or should I just whack off to Nicole Kidman? ENQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW!
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